


Atlantia

by availedobscurity



Category: The Penumbra Podcast
Genre: Beach Episode, Gen, penumbra exchange 2017, the first rule of beach is to have fun and be yourself and juno failed step one, they both deserve to have more fun okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-02
Updated: 2018-01-02
Packaged: 2019-02-27 05:08:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13241076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/availedobscurity/pseuds/availedobscurity
Summary: Rita tries to have a beach episode; Juno tries to do his job.





	Atlantia

**Author's Note:**

  * For [achievingelysium](https://archiveofourown.org/users/achievingelysium/gifts).



> Holiday gift for tumblr user riftlotor, who asked for some Rita & Juno friendship content. I hope you enjoy!

If Rita had learned one thing from working at the HCPD, and from working for Mr. Steel, and from watching and creating extensive moodboards for every episode of all 198 seasons of Hyperion Blue, detectives weren’t like other people. Which would have been fine; she had watched all 198 seasons and had a nuanced view of the profession. She’d even suffered through the boring arcs, the ones that were all serial murderers and watching the captain overcome his acute raccoon phobia to finally take his revenge on the killer that’d framed him for murdering his husband and his character wasn’t even all that interesting. She’d done her research (she always did). She knew enough about detectives to know how they operated. 

Except for one little, tiny problem. Mr. Steel wasn’t like other detectives, which made him double-not-like other people, and Rita didn’t know what she was supposed to do about that. They didn’t make streams about detectives who laid on the floor and didn’t take naps or eat balanced meals, and who didn’t remember their secretary’s birthdays, which was fine except he got so defensive about it and to be fair, she worked really hard to schedule his birthday every year, and sure, usually she forgot, but that wasn’t the point. The point was, Rita loved birthdays, so when a birthday happened, her own or otherwise, she liked to be in a good mood, and Mr. Steel could make that hard.

He was so mopey all the time. He couldn’t smile if someone pushed his mouth into the right shape for him - and Rita knew that because she’d tried a few times, and he’d just push her away and give her a talk about boundaries. It didn’t matter what she did to cheer him up. Surprise parties, in-office music days, arts and crafts projects; none of it worked. He was just like that, and it made her want to get out her yelling jar and give it some more juice for when she and Frannie opened it up at the end of the year. It was supposed to be symbolic or something; she’d never really listened to Frannie’s explanation. She was too busy watching the fireworks, usually, or thinking about the last thing Mr. Steel had done that made her wonder if she should bite the bullet and start tracking his comms.

Mr. Steel used to be more… reliable. Mr. Steel used to even be a little fun, sometimes. Not often, but sometimes. But now it was all dead-family, having-the-memory-of-everything-he-was-ever-proud-of-tainted-by-a-shady-government, and letting-go-of-everything-with-a-chance-to-make-him-happy, and it was getting tiring to keep up with what her boss was in a sour mood about at any given moment. It could really put a damper on Rita’s good mood, which was a disservice to the whole world. After all, as Rita liked to write on her business cards, a day without Rita was like a day without sunshine, and lately she’d had to spend a lot of days with a stream and a box of popcorn just to feel ready for the next day.

On the other hand, a day with Mr. Steel was like a day with a big dark storm cloud following her all over, but she thought he might be trying, a little bit, maybe, and Rita could appreciate that. It seemed like it was pretty hard to be Mr. Steel every day, so she made some allowances. But sometimes it got to be a little much for her. Most days, it got to be a little much for her. She was always on the lookout for the next thing to make it a little more _Juno Steel (and Rita) Detective Agency_ and a little less _Mr. Steel’s House of Nonstop Moping (And Rita’s House of Watching Soap Operas on the Clock)_.

Sometimes Rita had to do extensive planning to make it happen. Other times she wished for an opportunity and it fell right into her lap.

“Did you say the Atlantia Dome?” Rita asked the voice on the other end of her comms, clapping both hands palms-down onto her desk and pulling herself upwards. Her boss glanced over at the sound, curious, but not enough to remove his head from where he leaned it against the window frame.

“Yes, they, they found her--she went to the Atlantia Dome every Sunday, and,” the voice on the other end said, but Rita had stopped listening.

 _”Beach episode,”_ Rita whispered into the comms receiver, eyes wide and mind already whirring.

“What?” Juno asked from his usual ruminating spot, at the same time as the voice on the comms said _Pardon?_

“Call for you, Mr. Steel!” Rita yelled, jumping to her feet and reaching her comms arm as far across her desk towards him as she could, half-standing on her phone with the effort. “It’s from the _Atlantia Dome,_ they found a body on the beach and it’s all gross and bloated and they’re saying it was a regular scuba accident but I’ve got the widow now and she says the dead guy was a champion swimmer, but she must not have been _that_ good if she died in the ocean and--”

The voice on the other side of the comms began sobbing. Rita brought the comms back towards her, her chair spinning slightly with the change in weight distribution. “Oh, right, sorry. I’m sure she was real good at swimming, before she died at the beach like that,” Rita said consolingly into the receiver, then held it back out to Mr. Steel. “Boss, you gotta take this,” Rita said, twisting her shoulders to match the slow turn of her chair, already working on her checklist.

 

 

Rita had only been to the Atlantia Dome a few times before. It was a lot dirtier than she remembered. Bigger, though. And it looked just like all the beaches on the streams, once you got to the water and pretended it was a little more blue-green and a little less red-gray.

It was beautiful. Mr. Steel was standing on the dock, wearing his trenchcoat and what looked like the same mock turtleneck he’d been wearing the last three days straight. He didn’t take his coat off long enough for her to be able to tell for sure. He was committed to the aesthetic of the thing, which was one of her boss’s better traits. “Rita? Does this look like scratch marks to you?” he asked, crouching down and looking at something on the surface of the dock.

“Yeah, sure, boss,” Rita said, staring at the horizon and pulling her dress off over her head.

“They look fresh,” he started, absent in that way he got when he was working, then looked up at her. “Please don’t take your clothes off at work,” he said after a moment of silence.

“Boss, I have a bathing suit, that’s clothes, ain’t it?” she asked. “Besides, I’m not at work. I’m at the beach.”

“It’s not… I’m paying you for this, Rita,” Juno said.

“Not enough,” Rita shot back as she carefully took off her glasses and placed them on top her dress, which she anchored down with her shoes. She adjusted the straps of her one-piece, then took a running start off the dock.

Mr. Steel realized what she was doing a second too late. “Don’t--” he started, just before Rita leapt off the dock into the water. Rita stayed under for just long enough to enjoy the feeling of weightlessness, then shot back up and grabbed the edge of the dock.

“Cold, cold, cold, cold,” Rita said, curling herself up where she dangled shivering off the edge of the dock.

“I noticed that, yeah,” Juno said, and Rita looked up to see him drenched.

“Oh. Musta splashed a little more than I thought,” Rita said.

“A little?” he said, and took his coat off, and throwing it onto the ground.

“Mr. Steel, that’s a good look for you,” Rita said, carefully unfurling herself back into the water as her body adjusted to the temperature.

“What?” He looked down at his sleeveless crop top, revealed by the removal of his ever-present jacket. “Oh. I have a bunch of these,” he lied, as if Rita wouldn’t be able to tell. Rita did a backflip under the water and tried to decide whether it was better if he’d grabbed it from the bottom of his laundry pile or if he’d been wearing the same shirt for three days straight. Neither option was good, she concluded as she rose back out of the water.

“You done in there? Because I’m sure a murderer’ll wait for you to be done swim practice before he gets rid of any evidence that might be around,” he said.

Rita shook her head emphatically.

“Rita,” Mr. Steel said.

Rita spat the water she was holding in her mouth at him in a high, wide arc. It was more water than she expected her mouth to be able to hold. Looked like there was another secret Rita skill she could list on her resume. 

Rita and Mr. Steel stared at each other, Rita guileless, Mr. Steel resigned and dripping water.

“Why,” Juno asked, flat.

In answer, Rita slowly sunk down under the water, watching her boss watch her disappear beneath the small, slow waves.

She stayed beneath the roof of the water for as long as she could, feeling her hair fan out around herself. This is probably what her life would be like if she were born a mermaid. Except she’d be surrounded by merpeople, because she had legs and mermaids didn’t have those, and they’d be so impressed that she could walk in the human world that they’d make her the mermaid mayor, probably, unless they had a monarchy, in which case Rita would either have to marry into the mermaid royal family, which seemed like a whole lot of work, or overthrow the mermaid monarchy and put in place a new form of government by, for, from, and starring Rita. Oh, and it could be just like _The Pisces Project_ seasons nine through twelve, when--

Rita rose up to take another breath, her hair a slick veil covering for her face.

“Rita, will you get,” Mr. Steel said, but Rita was back underwater before she could catch the end of it, tilting her head to get the hair out of her eyes as she resurfaced, shaking her head and blinking herself back to sight.

“Sorry, boss, didn’t hear you, what were you saying?” she asked, shaking the water out of her ears.

“I found evidence of a struggle. Recent.” Rita stared up at him blankly. For the case, Rita.” Juno clarified, gesturing towards the police tape marking off a large portion of the beach.

“Oh, yeah. Great! Doing some old-fashioned detective work up there!” Rita said encouragingly, floating on her back.

He sighed. “Yeah. Sure am.” He put his coat back on one arm, then turned and began walking back down the dock.

“Mr. Steel!” Rita said, the sounds of her splashing in the water to keep up with his movements accompanying his footsteps on the old rusted metal. “I left my stuff over there! You can’t just leave it for anybody to take! What about the gulls?”

“Yeah, I can,” Juno said shortly.

“But Mr. Steel--” she began.

“Rita, just, keep playing in the ocean or whatever you want to do. I’m going to go check some visitor logs, maybe see if they have the tide charts for the week.” He didn’t even look at her. But that was Mr. Steel.

“Aren’t you gonna get in, Mr. Steel?” Rita asked, stumbling to her feet as the water became too shallow to continue her easy float.

“Why would I get in,” Juno asked-without-asking.

“You’re at the beach, Mr. Steel!” Rita said, the water falling off of her in sheets and the waves grabbing at her ankles, making her unsteady. “Dip your feet in!”

“Not much of an ocean person,” he said.

“You love the ocean!” Rita said, raising her legs as high out of the pull of the water as she could to try to keep up with him.

“I really don’t,” he said.

“Yeah, you do! When I mention I work for you people always say they hope you’re taking a nice long walk on a short pier,” Rita said.

“Off a short pier,” Juno said.

“I’m pretty sure it was on,” Rita said resolutely. “Anyway, come on, Mr. Steel!” She was shivering; the air was cold now that she was out of the water. “Enjoy yourself! Take a break!”

He sighed. “I’ll let you know if I need you to do your computer things,” he said, and left her standing in the water ankle-deep.

Rita frowned deeply, let out a small groan of frustration, and flopped backwards into the water with a splash.

 

 

It was almost sunset when her boss returned. Rita was sitting cross-legged on the dock. She had collected a piled of wave-smoothed stones and shells, and she threw them back into the water one at a time, ignoring the footsteps behind her.

“Are you supposed to throw them straight down like that?” Mr. Steel asked behind her. “I thought skipping stones was about making them… skip.”

“Maybe how you play it, Mr. Steel,” Rita said sullenly, staring at the short-lived ripples from her actions. They had long since disappeared without a trace before either of them spoke.

“It was the lifeguard,” her boss said.

“Oh. Real interesting,” Rita said, feeling the furthest thing from interested and throw-dropping another rock into the water. This one bounced, just a little, before it was consumed by the water below it. “Then they probably would have waited for me to be done swim practice after all, huh, boss?”

Mr. Steel considered it. “Guess so,” he said.

“I could’ve pretended I was drowning to get ‘em out here and everything,” she said, disappointed. “I never get to do any of the good detective stuff.”

“Maybe tomorrow,” he offered, and sat down next to her. Rita turned to face him in full, letting the stone in her hand drop.

“Really?” she asked, holding in a squeal.

“Maybe,” he said with a noncommittal jerk of the head. “We’ll see.”

Rita let go of the squeal she was holding in. “Oh, Mr. Steel, you are not gonna regret it, I am going to be the best possible drowning victim there’s ever been. The lifeguard’ll run into the water and I’ll say, well, I’ll say nothing, because I’ll be drowning. But after, when I tell them about the mermaids? That’ll get their attention, huh, Mr. Steel?”

“Sure. I might just arrest them, though,” he said, and Rita groaned.

“Mr. Steel, you’re no fun,” she said.

“That’s me,” he said, and she didn’t know what to say to that without being a little meaner than she should, so instead she threw a whole handful of rocks into the water. She and her boss watched them fall to the sandy floor below, and kept watching after they were gone.

“I was so excited when they started building this thing.” Sometimes Mr. Steel just started talking, if you waited long enough. Rita didn’t mind waiting, every once in a while. “Couldn’t wait to see what a real beach looked like, outside of the streams. We didn’t get out of the city much.” He stared out at the horizon. “We… never made it out here,” he said, soft.

Rita threw a shell into the water and didn’t look at him. “So? Whatya think of it, now that you’re here?” she asked.

“More murder than I expected,” he said, and Rita let out a hum of agreement. “But… It’s kind of nice. How was the water?” he asked.

Rita gestured downwards. “It’s all over the place, Mr. Steel, find out yourself.”

He shrugged, then reached over the side of the dock and looked down, estimating the distance. “I don’t have a bathing suit or anything,” he said in the direction of the water.

“Then take your shoes off! Dip your toes in!” Rita said. “Or maybe keep the shoes on. They smell really bad. Could be clinical.”

“Yours are worse,” he said. He stared at the setting sun a moment longer, then exhaled and began untying one of his shoes. “Why the hell not.”

“Mr Steel!” Rita said excitedly. “Get in that ocean! Feel the waves on your feet!”

“I’m getting to it,” Juno said, peeling his socks off. He scooted forwards on the dock so his leg was folded at the edge, and stared down at the water hesitantly before reaching a foot towards the surface.

“Do it do it do it do it!” Rita cheered.

“Yeah, okay, I’m doing it,” he said, and submerged his feet all the way with a shiver.

Rita waited a minute, then asked. “Well?”

“Well what?” Juno swirled his feet in the water a little.

“What do you think! Is it everything you wanted?” Rita asked. “Everything you _dreamed of?_ ”

Juno studied the place where the water circled his ankles. “Not really?” he said. “It’s just putting my feet in water. I thought it’d be… different, somehow.”

Rita considered that, then nodded. “Yeah. Guess you’re right.” She leaned back, and tossed another rock, underhanded this time. “But it beats being stuck in the office, huh?” she asked hopefully.

Juno leaned forward and rested his chin in his hands, watching the sun disappear. “I guess so,” he said, and Rita heard the melancholy in it.

She let herself fall rightward and lean her head against her boss’s shoulder. “Good,” she said as his arm jerked, then settled. “That’s good.” The rest of the light disappeared from the sky, leaving them with the moon and stars above reflecting on the flat plane of water ahead of them.


End file.
